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Author: Alicia R.

I let out a sigh but not one meant for frustration,
More like the one when your landing home from vacation.
Looking back two years prior
When my only concern was to get higher.

That darkness creeps over me like fallen smoke,
Stealing my breath and I choke.
From memory of the sickness that once consumed me
Maintaining how grateful and fortunate that I am now free.

With demons gone, those that I abhor
Pure bliss, laughter and love radiates through my core
I can give my children the life they deserve
These new memories I can now preserve.
If and when those temptations arise
Fleetingly come and go but will not be my demise!

Let my strength and faith shine hope for others still in a dark abyss
There is a way out and you can overcome this!
With enthusiasm to live and a hand reaching out
There is no blackness that you can not surmount!

Author: Alicia R. I let out a sigh

Author: E. Goodwin

When the sesh ends and your heart starts to shake
The high has gone, oh no, for goodness sake
We’ve all ran out of money and no one will tick
Reality kicks in, we begin to feel sick
We need that feeling of euphoria, when the pain is numbed
Anyone knows we will always be succumbed
When the sesh ends and your heart starts to shake
Only in time others and your heart will break
When the come down kicks in and you want to die
Your anxiety takes control, no more of that high
When you act out of character and send that unkind message
Get thoughts in ya head that are of a paranoid wreckage
You feel lonely in a crowded room, don’t trust ya friends
Convince yourself this is a phase but it never ends
When you feel shame, hatred and remorse for yourself
And constantly worry about your physical and mental health
Another guy in your town has died
Another one you used to hang with, his hands now tied
Too many sleepers caused a seizure in his sleep
My life suddenly flashes before my eyes, life becomes so bleak
I look at my life and how I try to change
Addiction brought us down these bad lanes
Can we ever break these vicious chains?
When the sesh ends and your heart starts to shake… your life goes on, keep going, don’t break.

Author: E. Goodwin When the sesh ends and

Author: Tricia L.

There is an
ACHE
a heavy-hearted feeling, I cannot equate anything to…

A shadow of sadness behind my smile as I mention your name
because of what
LIES
beneath….

I try each second to engulf you with all the layers of
LOVE
my body can give to make this pain disappear from your being…

I try to remain in SILENCE,

convince myself it is not there….
I try to welcome their presence… but they insist on remaining
HIDDEN

Small GEESE colored GREY trailing one another,
The BIG and small BLUE SKYY, seen below
Ostentatiously organic, RAIN drops in volume
A Representative special of its kind, with refined ingredients from The Capital City of Russia, stoic STOLI.
The FOREIGN UNCLE… PAVING THE WAY AND WAS THE ONE & ONLY… TIL THE OTHERS BECKONED TO BE PART OF THE SECRET

I try to
BLINK
them away, a figment of my imagination
They continue to
REAPPEAR
surprise, and catch me off guard

I try not to succumb into
TEARS,
to crumble in my vulnerability
To remain
STRONG, COURAGEOUS
I try not to buckle, I fell in heaps of sobs
I try not to continue in the evening

Author: Tricia L. There is an ACHE a heavy-hearted feeling,

Author: Torious W.

Aspirations of a better life, one without drugs and alcohol, one without strife. Spirits high, heart in the right place, mind grounded in a good head space. Emotions in check unlike before, if it continues to be this way don’t know what’s in store. I know I have a bright future ahead, if I hadn’t changed some things in my life, I could have been dead. Positive energy flowing through my veins, reading my writings I can see that I’ve changed. More work to do I’m only beginning, woke up this morning sober, so I’m already winning. It feels good now to have a sense of direction, I have a program to work and GOD for protection. Aspirations are good, but faith without works is dead, I can face the rest of life now it’s full speed ahead!!

Author: Torious W. Aspirations of a better life,

Author: Haylee T.

Hey there, you remember me I’m lil ole crystal. Chrystal meth yep that’s me . You were told about me why didn’t you just stay the hell away. You chose to test me like a fool and now can’t get away. All that shit the last author told you was for real not some story made up but facts were they were real. Yeah It’s true I do destroy family’s that’s just the start I turn you away from everyone that loves you I make you hate them for nothing other than being worried and concerned about the demon you have became. I take the children I sure do in more than one way I let the state have them or I drive mothers away or worse i drive them to slay the young I’m Chrystal meth no remorse because they were just in my damn way. I slowly take every bit of human away right down to the soul don’t try to fight it’s useless I now hold you hostage in my grips you will stay for all eternity I make your mind a fearful dark place I have it always running in place. I’m taking everything from you one by one even two by two even right down to your youth and health your face all sunken in look like a bare skull and aging skin so fast your teeth are no more soon you will be nothing more than a skeleton with skin And in the worst of times I got you thinking of making it an end suicide is always on your mind a hand full of pills or a rope in a tree but I’ll instead keep you wishing your life was over. But I’m not threw with you yet bitch buckle up it gets worse from here. You stupid bitch you chose to do me over and over more here and there no longer can do a little shit You have to do a whole g blast it brings you to your knees and you can just manage to be okay with being here trac marks all over your body when you look in the mirror what do you see A meth monster or can you see an image deep down within yourself a glimpse if you will of who you was just a short 2 years ago from here and now. If you could have seen what nasty and miserable empty person or shell you are sitting here you’ve become so addicted lifeless and All because you didn’t hear the fucking warns of the satanic and controlling narcotic charms you stupid bitch now you fucked up You played with fire now your gonna burn lay back in your fucking grave it’s now your turn to be dragged to hell. I own your soul!! So don’t forget about me and what I cost because I cost more to. You than anything that can be bought your life revolves around putting me in your fucking arm.

By: Haylee Jo Taylor

Author: Haylee T. Hey there, you remember me

Author: Chris J.

Us drunks and addicts-can at times be naive-this disease of addiction-lets us look but not see-the reality we live in-each and everyday-this disease loves fantasy-and it likes to play-with our minds and emotions-our hearts and our souls-it just patiently waits-it has no other goals-but to breed chaos in our lives-every chance that it gets-to fill us with more pain-heartaches and regrets-and just when you think-that you got this thing beat-it throws you a curve ball-and sweeps you right off your feet-and starts your mind to racing-and your emotions to churn-your heart to breaking and your soul to burn-then you think of that drug-or maybe that drink-if I only have one-I won’t have to think-about anything or anyone-today or tomorrow-I can just sit and wallow-in self–pity and sorrow-why doesn’t anyone understand-I’m perfect can’t they see-everything would be alright-If everyone was more like me-there isn’t a thing-that I can’t do-I’m perfect in everything-bummer to be you-and the longer I stay-in this unhealthy state-I get further and further-away from my fate-of getting closer to my God-as I possibly can-and start reaching out-to my fellow man-and get out of me-and my sick mind-so serenity and peace-I might find!

Author: Chris J. Us drunks and addicts-can at

Author: Andrew N.

Tears reunite with my cheeks once again
Just as the dark clouds above start to rain
It Felt as if God was their crying with me
I felt he was close yet my eyes couldn’t see

A man wearing red who looked my age but no older
Comes over to me and puts his arm round my shoulder
Before he could speak I just broke down and cried
As if I had found out that morning a loved one just died

He spoke not a word and just lent a kind ear
Making me feel that thy father was near
I suddenly realised, I was grieving you see
The person who died was none other than me

I was mourning the loss of a man in good health
and took shelter in seeking a life of false wealth
as gold turned to copper and patience to fear
the mountain to climb for forgiveness was sheer

ive never said sorry for letting you down
for not sending a lifeboat when you started to drown
I let your broad shoulders carry more than its fair load
Stopped your lips from saying you’re about to explode

Your children were left with a shell of a man
A dad that just didn’t do all that he can
I buried Your hurt and kept it deep down inside
And I picked the wrong people for you to confide

Why did I let weakness walk in through the door
And then let you think you could deal with some more
You broke so many walls down which I quickly rebuilt
But each one I made higher adding anger and guilt

Whilst death in mortality can’t be erased and undone
I know you’ll come back once more from that place past the sun
When we’re united there is no turning back
I promise I’ll always help you loosen the slack

Ill save you from drowning and be your strength when you’re weak
I will unlock your lips forever letting you speak
I’ll give your energy back and desires to care
You’ll gain the trust of your kids to know you’ll always be there

When self doubt comes knocking I’ll never open the door
Ill shut all the windows and the curtains will draw
I’ll show you the lessons you’ve learned through the pain
And each time you fall I’ll pick u up again

Author: Andrew N. Tears reunite with my cheeks

Author: Chris J.

It’s so easy to slip back-to the way I used to think-when I was consumed with self-and the drugs and the drink-denying that voice-that you hear in your gut-then with eyes wide open-slip back into that rut-of complacency and procrastination-self–loathing and depression-the poor me syndrome-the denial and oppression-this disease of addiction-never takes a rest-if you don’t stay on top of it-it will show you who’s best-but I know what I’m doing-you keep telling yourself-as you slip away from your God-and put it up on a shelf-and there it waits patiently-watching you spin out of control-until you fall to your knees-your will again has taken its toll-and then if you’re lucky-and didn’t end up dead-you’ll start listening for that voice-and get out of your head-and pull your God off that shelf-and let it back in your gut-to love and guide you-and lift you out of that rut-so you can live your truth-and be productive again-for self and mankind-with your God till the end- and count your blessings-no matter how few-for there are others worse off-but for the grace of your God-it could be you!

Author: Chris J. It's so easy to slip

Author: Chris J.

Addiction is a disease-of pain without grace-loneliness abound-searching for a face-which way to turn-how will I travel-all directions seem wrong-this panic to unravel-hope is but an ember-threatened to be smothered-longing for a touch-wanting to be mothered-oh woe is me-as I stand here stripped-emotionally crippled-spiritually unequipped-please please please God-if there is such a thing-send forth a angel-to embrace me in it’s wing-and bring me home-where I need to be-into your loving warmth-perpetually free!

Author: Chris J. Addiction is a disease-of pain